“I really shouldn’t have stopped talking to that guy just because he ended a sentence in a preposition. I’m going to die alone. I think I’d rather be a shapeshifting wolf than a shapeshifting cat, because I’d rather curl up in a den than climb a tree. The tree seems far more out in the open. But cats are so stealthy. Maybe there’s a cross between a cat and a dog. Giles from Buffy said that’s what hyenas were. But hyenas are ugly. I really need to get off this paranormal romance kick. Holy shit, I’m not going to get this assignment finished in time. Maybe I should get up right now and work on it. It’s 1:00, though. If I was going to work on it, I should’ve done so rather than watching Netflix. Maybe I could get up and watch Netflix. Fuck I should go to sleep. I think this mattress really is growing on me… even if that guy did swindle me to make a sale. Do people say ‘swindle’ anymore?”